If you care about how people perceive you, then it’s time to seriously think about your next boat purchase. Here’s some general information, stereotypes, and biased opinions. So, don’t write to our editor if you’re offended — instead, try to have a good laugh. And if you’re still upset, maybe grab a beer or take a nap. Is your boat a shiny pair of Nike sneakers, or is it more like cowboy boots? Like your favourite pair of footwear, your boat makes a statement. So, what does it say about you?
We analyse local Gold Coast boating enthusiasts to understand how they see themselves as captains and what their boats say about them.
FISHING BOAT
Fishermen are masters of the sea, experts at finding the right conditions, using the best tackle, and knowing the habits of different species. They’re usually helpful when they can be, but at the end of the day, they’re on a mission: to catch that elusive target. Much like gold prospectors, they won’t stop until they’ve achieved their goal. Talk to any recreational fisherman, and most will tell you they’re living the dream. Their only real complaint? Not enough time to fish.
Their rigs range from expensive centre consoles to budget-friendly half cabins with screw-on rod holders. They might look scruffy and speak in jargon, but generally, they’re the good guys on the water. Just don’t get in their way.
SAILING BOAT
Sailing is usually a family tradition, a generational art and attitude. With a vast array of technical terms for equipment and methods, sailors exhibit great bravery and an even greater sense of adventure. They’re the only boaters who teeter on the edge of capsizing and push themselves and their vessels to the limit in speed and bad weather.
Sailors range from humble working-class families in small overnight boats to the wealthiest individuals navigating their floating homes from one idyllic anchorage to the next. They all share a deep understanding of nature and a passion for harnessing its power. Sailors are generally polite, sometimes snobbish, and incredibly diverse, with fascinating stories to tell.
PONTOON BOAT
The pontoon boat is a versatile watercraft, chosen for its practicality and ease of use. Some owners are first-time boaters, while middle-aged and older folks love the walkon decks, especially those who live on the waterfront with residential pontoons. Being trailerable with a large carrying capacity, they’re great for family outings.
Pontoon boat owners are often looking for a social experience rather than worrying about their image. They want all the extras without paying too much and prioritize comfort over style. While they love the idea of the great outdoors, they also enjoy returning home to the comfort of an air-conditioned bedroom and a pillow-top mattress.
YACHT
Yachts are typically owned by those who can afford them — often self-employed individuals or retirees enjoying the fruits of their labour. Let’s be honest, motor yachts are rich people’s boats. They’re not concerned with what boating enthusiasts think of them, and they’re not interested in the complexities of sailing.
The motor yacht is the most comfortable option, big enough to feel like a living room, complete with all the amenities like a big-screen TV, kitchen, and crew quarters. And when you want a new view, just pull up anchor, fire up the engines, and cruise to the next destination at speed.
JET SKI
Jet skis offer an accessible entry point to our waterways, but they’re not ideal for family outings if you want to spend all day out on the water with gear. Jet skis are easier to handle than boats, which is part of their appeal. Jet skiers are to the boating world what “P-platers” are to drivers on the road. Sure, there are some good ones, but even they’ll admit they’re outnumbered by the hoons who give everyone heart-stopping moments.
Tattoos are optional but common, and many jet skiers have a loose grasp of marine etiquette. Depending on the age of the ski and the rider’s experience, you may very well end up rescuing one. If you like going fast, around in circles with no destination in mind, then a jet ski is for you.
WAKE BOAT
Wakeboarders are thrill-seekers, adrenaline junkies who enjoy high speeds and towing stunts. They embrace the X Games lifestyle, earning themselves a distinct spot on the social ladder among boaters. Wake boats create large wakes that often draw attention from other boats and irate waterfront homeowners.
No boaters dive into their lifestyle quite as deeply as wake boat owners. They’ve got all the gear: jackets, boards, ropes, and it’s usually all in black. Whether it’s water skiing, wakeboarding, or wake surfing, this type of boat offers performance, versatility, value, and the cool factor of a backward baseball cap.
TINNY
There are three main types of tinny (or dinghy) owners: the yacht tender user, the budget-conscious fisho, and the dreaded “tinny rat.” The first is respectful and thoughtful, often seen scooping up trash from the waterways. The fishing tinny is a great starting point for new boaters. They’re easy to tow and manoeuvre, and in Queensland, they can access shallow areas. Just make sure you’ve got a bimini for sun protection, and don’t fish in the main channels with all the other tinnies.
The “tinny rat” is a reckless, often under-aged nuisance on the waterways, causing havoc and endangering themselves and others. But hey, we were all young once, right?
We could stereotype boat owners all day. We all have our biases, and we often find those different from us amusing or even ridiculous. But most of us can agree on one thing: jet skiers and tinny rats could use a little more supervision. And let’s be honest — we’d all probably like to retire on a bigger boat, whether motor or sail, as long as it’s perfect for hosting the ideal sundowner
Published in print January-March 2025
